It's A Girl
by daynaa
Summary: SpeedCalleigh, and EricCalleigh friendship to start. R&R.
1. Chapter 1

A/N: So I've been writing scripts and stuff, and I thought I could turn this one into a nice Eric/Calleigh story. The details will be vague, I shall add a story that precedes this one (I think that's right…precedes haha) to explain how this one came to be, but for now, here this is. I will also add on more later, but yeah, for now this shall be good I suppose. I have enough stories to update right now hah I'm almost done my next Christmas with Calleigh chapter hah yay.. here we go:

--& Calleigh's POV &--

I still remember the day they found you. I wouldn't believe them. I refused to face the truth. I thought they were lying, I honestly did. I honestly believed that they were just trying to hurt me, to break me, in any way possible. I need you more than I ever did. I can still feel you, when I'm alone, holding me tight. Protecting me like you always did, like you promised me you always would. You promised me you'd never leave. Sometimes I swear I feel you shaking me gently, calling me back ton the consciousness of another day, but when I open my eyes, it's not you. Then I remember you're gone and my heart dies again. It shatters, explodes. Every time I'm reminded you're gone, gone forever, you're not coming back, my heart breaks into a million pieces and I wish I was gone too. But I couldn't do what you did to me to someone else. True, I'm destroyed, but I'm not a destroyer. Then some days, my sorrow is suddenly gone and vengeance and spite take its place. You've broken you're promises, you've broken my heart, and I hate you for it. I loved you, couldn't you see that? I really did. What happened wasn't my fault, you know, and I know that everyone told you to do the right thing, but you couldn't, could you? So you jumped ship, in the worst possible way. I would have rather you walked out on my life, on our life, rather than your own. You left, and I have to go on. It would have been easier, don't you see, for me to tell my daughter, she's going to be a girl you know, that her Dad had to go away, that he didn't have a choice, to make up a heroic story, because I would have done that for you, I loved you that much, rather than to tell her that you killed yourself. Rather to tell it was our fault you died, in some twisted way. You were perfect in my mine, as you could have been in hers. You didn't have a single flaw. To me, you were the reflection of perfect, and I would have done anything for you. How was I blinded by your love and promises? How was I so naïve to think you would love me too, no matter what, if you ever loved me at all, that is. You promised you were different, and now you left me like everyone else. I still have to get up every day, and push one more memory to the back of my mind. I have to get up and pretend that one more thing isn't ripping me apart inside. You don't have to wake up every morning anymore. You don't have to have your heart shattered to pieces every single time you open you're eyes. You took the easy way out, you left me with broken promises and nearly hopeless tomorrows, and that's all I'd have left if it weren't for this girl. The girl that killed you. And I'll love her more than I loved you, because she's you and more than that, she's me as well. I'll do anything to give her the life I never had. I'll do anything for her.

--& Eric's POV &--

Do you know what it feels like? It doesn't compare to anything else in the world, except maybe the continuous reminders that you're gone and you're responsible. I really can't believe you did things this way, how could you leave her? How could you leave me? How could someone as amazing as you do this to yourself, to all of us? Did it make it more fun to know what you were leaving behind? How many people depended on you? How many people loved you? The promises you made, the lies you made to earn my trust, did they replace your self-respect, did they replace your soul? You used to have the biggest heart, when we were little kids, when did everything change? Do you know how much that hurts? Do you know what you've done to me, and not only me, we were _only _best friends, but to your girlfriend, to your child? You died in such a dishonest, painless way… it makes me sick to think about it. The only thing that makes me sicker is to think how blinded I was, how blinded we all were, by your promises, by your image of false perfection that we couldn't see through. You left this world knowing I loved you, trusted you, and confided in you like I did with no one else. Hell, I told you that minutes before you took your own life. I can't imagine how she feels, I feel bad enough but you were her everything, and you chose to leave. Who's the one helping her through this all now? Me. She wasn't going to force you into anything, she was simply telling you because you had a right to know. You chose to shatter her, to leave me, and now, I am paying more than the price for my will to trust others when no one else did. Do you remember all those years ago when no one else would trust you, and I was your friend? Your best friend. Then things changed and now I am paying for my faith, for my hope, for everything that I put into giving you a second chance just like everyone warned me I would. Now I don't know if I'll ever be able to trust anyone again. When you were around, I was never more than second best, and now I've finally proven that I'm better than you. Who should be up with her when it's six in the morning and she is throwing up? It should be you. But it's me. I didn't get into this situation, you did, and you got out, but I'm still here. Knowing that I've proven myself finally, that we all understand now, what a horrible person you were, doesn't make it any easier though, because when you were around, I didn't mind being second best, and knowing that all those years were a lie… that hurts more than anything else. Knowing that I'm taking your place in your daughter's life, it's a girl by the way, rips me up inside. But maybe you didn't deserve to be her father, not if you didn't want it because this girl will be amazing, and you'll never know how much you missed out.

--&

CONFUSING? Yes I would think it would be confusing, but I'll clear things up soon. For now, reviews would be b greatly /b appreciated! Thank you for reading!


	2. Chapter 2

Chapter Two:

A/N: So I was about to delete this story, because I didn't know what to do with it. But then I re-read the reviews And I decided to continue it. Thank you a LOT for those reviews, they made me feel happy, and obviously encouraged me to continue hah. I'm not TOO tired yet because it's only six in the morning and I don't think I'm going to sleep tonight hah I shall just wait and sleep tomorrow night, so I'll keep updating for now, I suppose. I went for a jog too hahaha. I love it. It's like getting up early and being a morning person, only I haven't gone to bed yet haha. Am I really weird? Haha I think maybe.

--& Eric's POV &--

"Calleigh?" I call as I knock on her condo's door. Well, at this point, pound would be a more accurate word. I haven't talked to her in two days. It's been too much of a shock, I had to let it sink in, and I couldn't see her while I did that. I was afraid of what I might say, and god knows she didn't need to be hurt anymore than she already had been in the past 48 hours. The door suddenly swings open and I nearly fall back. I wasn't expecting that. I immediately step inside and embrace her in a hug. "I'm sorry. I'm so sorry."

"It's not your fault." She answers me coldly, shutting the door around me. As I take in her appearance, it makes me want to break down again. I've never seen her like this before. She still looked as beautiful as ever, just not in the way she usually did. Usually, she had a certain calm, collected, superior beauty about her. Professional, would be another way to describe it. Perfect, even. But now, she looked anything but. Her red and swollen eyes fit perfectly with her tearstained cheeks and he had never seen her dressed so casually in a rather sheer robe and a pale chemise.

"I know… I just…" I tried to explain.

"It's okay Eric, I get it." She told me. "Did you come here for a specific reason?" Obviously she wasn't in a mood for socializing, and that was understandable. She had just lost her husband, after all.

"I was just checking to make sure you didn't need anything. You have to take care of yourself still, you know." I reminded her.

"Why do you care? And what's it to you if I take care of myself?" She shot at me. That was low. She has to know I cared about her as more than my best friends girlfriend? We'd always been closer than that.

"Sorry, it's just, I always considered you a close friend…" I told her, and instantly her hard gaze softened, "And you aren't just taking care of yourself anymore, remember that." I told her and then turned to leave. I got the feeling she didn't really want me there.

"Eric, I'm sorry." She told me, and I turned back around to face her. She looked, if possible, more broken than before.

"It's okay." I sigh.

"I'm just so… angry, so defensive. You remind me of him and that makes me nervous, I guess." She shrugged, another tear slipping down her cheek. "Eric, I don't know if I can do this." She whispered.

"Cal," I sigh, and wrap my arms around her in a hug. Something I've been longing to do for two days now. I hold her as she sobs into my shoulder. "You can do this. And you won't have to do it alone. I'm here for you. Always. And the rest of the team is too. Horatio, Alexx… heck, I'm sure the whole lab and the whole PD's office is here for you." I try to lighten the mood a tinge.

"Yeah." I feel her strain a smile, and that breaks my heart all over again. This was the girl who would brighten my day at six in the morning at a triple homicide scene by smiling at me, and now she couldn't force a smile midday at a joke. The life was draining out of her at the very time when she should have been glowing; there was more life inside of her than ever before. But he took it all away from her. A man we thought we knew so well. We didn't know him at all. Not if he could do this.

"I promise you Cal," I continued, "There is no way I am leaving you to do this alone. No way in hell."

"Eric, I wouldn't want to impose…" She protested.

"No way in hell I am leaving you alone now." I repeat. This time she doesn't protest. Whether it's from lack of reason to, or lack of energy to, it doesn't matter to me. She couldn't force me out of her life now even if she wanted to.

"Well, in that case would you mind running to the store?" She asks, pulling out of the embrace we'd been sharing.

"Not one bit. Cravings?" I smile.

"You seem to know a lot about pregnancy." She tells me with a questioning look.

"Three older sisters." I answer. She nods with a skeleton of a smile on her face.

"Cookie dough ice-cream, please." She tells me.

"Coming right up. I'll be back in ten minutes?" I tell her.

"I'll make some coffee." She nods.

"But none for you." I remind her, and she rolls her eyes.

"I'm not stupid, Eric." She tells me, "I know all the rules, and I already took my vitamins." How did she know I was about to ask that?

"I'll see you in ten." I repeat before I'm out the door. We both know I'll probably speed and be back in five, because we both know I worry about her being alone in her state. I pause for a moment outside her closed door, and I hear her slide to the floor behind it.

"You screwed up Speed, and I'm not going to waste my time crying over you. Not anymore." And I leave, before another tear can makes its way down my face. No way in hell.

--&

A/N: Less confusing? Gosh I hope so. So Speed was the father/husband. And do not fear, I LOVE Speed. I didn't plan on it being him, but I didn't want to do a whole background story on some random character hah, and there's no way I am writing a story in which Calleigh married Hagen. Yuck. It'll get more Speed friendly soon. I love him, never fear. Please review!


	3. Chapter 3

Chapter Three:

A/N: Still sore, more so than before, but that is okay. I am in a writing mood. I'm supposed to sleep hah, because I have to get up and go out early tomorrow with friends, but ohwell. Thank you for the wonderful reviews, they keep me writing! Here we go:

--&

As predicted, five minutes later, Eric was knocking on Calleigh's door. She answered, silently this time, and let him in.

"Cookie dough ice cream." He handed her the bag, and she showed him the two spoons she had been holding by her side.

"Milk and sugar?" She asked.

"Thanks." He nodded, moving to the living room of the condo with the ice cream and spoons. Just being here with Calleigh made him need to break down, it was overbearing, but he couldn't. If it was this hard for him, he couldn't imagine how hard it was for her. She had to live here every day like she used to with him. Sleep here, eat here. That couldn't be easy.

"Here you go." Calleigh handed him the coffee and he offered a faint smile in response. "Do you want to watch TV or something?"

"Sure." Eric shrugged. As long he was here, trying to support her as best he could. She flicked the TV on and proceeded to flip through the channels until she reached a crime show. As they watched it, they didn't even bother make fun of the TV investigators like they usually would. It didn't seem right without him. Nothing did.

--& Flashback &--

"Hey man, want to come over and hang out for a while?" Speed asked as he entered the locker room after shift.

"I don't know." Eric sighed. He did want to hangout with his friend, but he had also promised his temporary girlfriend he'd make plans with her that evening. "I told Rachael that I'd take her somewhere tonight…"

"You can take her somewhere after. Just come over when you're done in here alright?" Speed told him, before heading out the door.

"Sure." Eric replied. Rachael could wait. He quickly packed up his things and headed for his car. When he got out to the parking lot, Eric saw Speed's bike disappearing down the street and he shook his head with a chuckle. Speed. Minutes later, he pulled up at his friends building, a place he hadn't been in quite a long time. They were both busy with their new girlfriends when they weren't working, which wasn't often, so there hadn't been much guy-time on the clock. Eric buzzed himself in, and headed up the elevator.

"Hey." Speed smiled as he answered the door. Something was up, Eric decided, if Speed was smiling like that. Or maybe Calleigh was just rubbing off on him.

"Hey," Eric nodded as he stepped inside. "Wow, this place is…"

"Clean?" Speed finished his sentence. "I know. I've been spending most of my time at Calleigh's."

"Right." Eric nodded. That made sense. He knew Speed wasn't, but he'd hung out with Calleigh at her place more than a few times, and he knew she liked things to be very neat. She would have hated how Speed's condo normally looked. "Are you okay, you seem to be acting different." Eric noted.

"Yeah, never been better." Speed answered as they made their way to the living room. "I just had to talk to you about something and you have to promise not to freak out or anything."

"Okay…" Eric replied.

"So Calleigh and I have been dating for four months now." He told Eric, who nodded, seeing now that this could go in two directions from here. Both of them made him a little frightened. "Do you think I'll be rushing things if I propose?" A little frightened, indeed. But it was better than him breaking up with her, he supposed.

"Well, the way you two look at each other… you're in love." Eric started. "And if you think it's going to last forever… then I'd say go for it. I'm happy for you guys." Eric smiled, giving his friend a pat on the arm.

"Thanks." Speed sighed. "I just… I wanted to do it so badly, but I didn't know if I was rushing things… and well, I consider you to be my best friend, so I figured I could ask you."

"Anytime." Eric smiled again. "But you should calm down a bit first, it's a little predictable that something's up."

"Okay." Speed nodded, taking it into account.

"When are you going to do it?" Eric wondered.

"Tonight. I've got a big date planned…" Speed explained.

"Sounds great. Well, I guess I should leave you to get ready then." Speed nodded. "So good luck, and I guess I'll find out tomorrow how things went."

"Thanks." Speed smiled again as Eric got up to leave. "Have fun with Rachael."

"I always do."

--& Present &--

Eric remembered that night clear as day. He remember the smiles on Speed and Calleigh's faces as they entered work the next day together and told everyone the news. They were ecstatic. When had things begun to change? It was only five months ago that he had been sitting with Speed on this couch as he explained his intentions with Calleigh, and now… well now he was gone.

"You okay?" Calleigh asked, noticing Eric had a faraway look on his face and tears in his eyes.

"I should be the one asking you that." Eric smiled faintly, and Calleigh shrugged.

"I'm not the only one that was close to him, Eric. You guys were best friends. You miss him too." She reasoned.

"I guess." Eric shrugged. No doubt, he did miss Speed… but Calleigh… did she feel responsible? He didn't hold her responsible, but he knew, from dealing with countless families of suicide victims, that they often blamed themselves. But Calleigh dealt with those families too, but that didn't necessarily mean she would react better.

"I didn't see it coming." Calleigh told him suddenly. "At first, he was ecstatic at the prospect of having a child. We'd even talked about it before. It just doesn't make any sense." The tears that had been welling up in her eyes, threatening to fall for minutes now, finally made their way down her cheeks, and Eric took her into his arms.

"It doesn't make any sense at all." Eric sighed, as he held her tight. He held her tight until she fell asleep, at which point he carefully and gently laid her out on the couch and found a blanket and pillow from the linen closet to make her more comfortable. He scribbled a note saying that he'd be back in a few hours, just in case she woke up before then, and he left. It was days like this he hated living in Miami. They had just lost a best friend, a colleague, a husband… and the Miami sun was a bright and cheerful as ever, a constant contrast with him mood. Getting in his car he drove carelessly and quickly to the crime lab. He walked at double speed through the building until he found the man he was looking for.

"Horatio," He said breathlessly, as he entered his boss's office.

"Eric," Horatio drawled, "What can I do for you?"

"I… I need to know about Speed." Eric told him, and Horatio's face had a sudden change in dynamic.

"What about Speed?" Horatio asked.

"The case. Can I see the file?" Eric wondered, and Horatio sighed. He should have taken more cautious measures, he should have known that they'd get curious sometime or another.

"No." Horatio answered plainly.

"Why not?" Eric pressed.

"I'm not allowed to show you the file of an ongoing case if you're not working it." Horatio told him.

"Ongoing case? It was a suicide." Eric had found what he was looking for. Something was off all along. This could be it.

"Eric, you know I can't give out information about this case to you. And I hardly know the details of the case myself. We're compromised." Horatio explained.

"We're grieving. Have you been to visit Calleigh? Have you seen her?" Eric knew his voice was raising. He knew this could cost him his job, but at this point, he didn't care. "She blames herself Horatio, and if there was any way this wasn't a suicide… she needs to know."

"Eric, you know false hope does no good." Horatio reasoned. He had tried to see Calleigh the previous day, but she wouldn't see him. She wouldn't see anyone. Well, anyone but Eric, evidently.

"What if it's not false hope?" Eric argued.

"Eric," Horatio began. "As soon as I know anything more concrete about this case, I will let you know, but until then… please do not tell Calleigh about this conversation. I can only imagine how broken she is right now… and giving her false hope and then taking it away will only worsen things." Eric knew he was right, but it didn't make him any less angry.

"Fine." He nearly spat at his boss, turning to leave.

"And Eric?" Horatio called, before he left the room completely.

"What?"

"Take care of her." Horatio gave him a small smile. And the anger was gone.

--&

A/N: Sorry, I didn't really know how to end this chapter. Okay, so I definitely wanted to start getting more of the actual storyline rolling. It will get more Speed-friendly soon. Please review!


End file.
